The Scientist

Kissed the Scientist the other night. Inviting myself and two friends to his concert tomorrow night. Ok so it’s not *his* concert, it’s his friend’s concert. I hope the Bicyclist and his friend will come with me! The Scientist does not want me as a date. He has people to hang out with. But if Bike and our friend go, I could peel off and try to get a midnight kiss from the Scientist. I don’t think I can fuck up any worse than when I kissed him the other night….

Well, yeah, but you *have * to kiss someone at midnight on New Years Eve. It’s compulsory.


Considering parenthood in OUAT

I looked like an asshole tonight on Tumblr, not that anyone will notice.

There’s a perfectly valid argument that Emma has zero claim to her biological son Henry on account of signing away her parental rights when she gave him up for a closed adoption.

As a responsible adult, she should have dropped Henry off at home and never come back. On the other hand, he wanted her in his life and it was his choice to seek her out.

The mysterious white wolf causes Emma to crash her car, and thus, we have a television show. Despite her and Henry’s cries of “Bye bye Regina,” Emma *should* be making sure he goes back to his real mother. Who *is* Regina.

It is actually Archie who is the very first person to use the words “custody battle,” but mainly because Regina has gone way over the line and threatened twice to “ruin” him. Archie also had a chat with Henry in the mine’s elevator shaft that made him reconsider what is the right thing to do. And the right thing is to stop Regina from hurting Henry.

But in any custody battle, Regina automatically wins. And should win. My grandparents are not my sister’s, really. I finally spoke to my sister in the phone and heard her voice for the first time. She really sounds like you’d expect her to sound. Way more mature than me at an entire decade younger. Then again, her mother died of Lou Gehrig’s disease! And yes, her mother was her mother. Our mother was not her mother. Our mother was my mother, but then again, she didn’t really feel like a mother to me either.

But our bio mom left me with her parents, who enable my four a.m. television musings, and she left my sister with a couple more sensible people out west. My sister had to deal with so much more bullshit. She had to deal with my bullshit too. That’s the problem with biological families. Blood is the worst.

Well, Henry doesn’t agree, cuz his grandmother is Snow White. And really, despite her perfectly valid claim on Henry as his mother, Regina has lost him and everything else when she is outed as The Evil Queen. So then why are we so pissed off at Emma? Because she noses into a situation that is none of her business? And totally fucks with everybody including a boy that may have come out of her vagina but is not in fact, her son? Well we wouldn’t have a show. Emma wouldn’t break the Dark Curse. Her parents would still be trapped in an eternal time loop. August would probably act douchey some more.

Rumple orchestrated everything. He gets his way, too…

But ok, so Emma is in the wrong. But ….

Then again, I suppose we can dislike Henry’s biological family, but his mom is in fact the Evil Queen, the two of them have a strained relationship made even worse when this is open, and Snow doesn’t want to let him anywhere near her enemy.

Yes they need to hash it out and discuss all this crazy shit but I doubt Regina gets her son back anytime soon, if ever. But that’s really not the most questionable storytelling choice in this frigging show. I was talking on Facebook about it too…

Ahhh, 4 am. Smartphone. Supposed to be gettin ready for new years tomorrow. Work on new years day! Yes as a cashier . Two degrees but same old same old

New Year Resolutions – Part One



3) *ahem* Just in case you didn’t hear me, Eris, go get a real fucking job.

4) Stop writing and posting Mad Queen fanfiction. Ohhhh my god, you look like a psycho.

5) Resume your physical therapy! Jeez!

6) HOWEVER…don’t have ~sexual relations~ again until you’re in love, or in a committed relationship. Fuckin’ seriously.

7) Exercise! You’re supposed to be doing that everyday along with your physical therapy shit anyway. It’s part of it.

8) Diet, while you’re at it.

9) Did I mention you need to stop writing and posting Mad Queen fanfiction, because it’s starting to make you look like a crazy person.

10) Speaking of “crazy,” you need to get a handle on your Internet addiction as soon as fucking possible (she said on the Internet)…

So apparently this happened (Teenage Eris’ Hobbit Slashfics)

subject: 2002 – hobbitslash!
eventtime: 2003-07-10 16:23:00
itemid: 170
Tags: lord of the rings, prose, fanfiction, merry/pippin, slash

We begin our tale on a clear and crisp spring morning in the Shire. Birds sang melodically just outside of Brandyhall and crickets ceased their chirping. Meriadoc Brandybuck rolled over and snorted in his sleep. A daring lone fly buzzed past the yawning mouth of Peregrin Took. The sun rose slowly, as though apprehensive of the events that were to transpire.

Lord of the Rings: Return of the King flashback – December 2003/January 2004

Our story begins with my purchase of The Two Towers on DVD.

Icon: way too easily amused
subject: *turns into Strong Bad* The Two Towers special D v D
eventtime: 2003-11-30 13:37:00
itemid: 2966
There are a shitload of deleted scenes, just like with Fellowship, which I wish they hadn’t cut out and am glad were put back in. I understand that a person doesn’t want to sit in a movie theater for four hours, so yeah, the movie was trimmed a bit.And my favorite scene they cut out? Merry and Pippin (nach) after the battle at Isengard finding some poor soul’s secret stash of pipeweed…the best in South Farthing! I cannot believe this is just tobacco, the way those hobbits’ faces lit up and they made all kinds of excuses of why they shouldn’t tell anybody about their find. And an ent like walks over and sees all this smoke pouring out of this dilapidated house along with giggling. Merry and Pippin are total stoners. lol. I heart them muchly.

I ask if it’s December 17th yet, which is the premiere of Return of the King. Then I talk about stalking my ex-boyfriend JP, or something.

Then I have a crisis of faith about being an English major. (Duh.)

I write out some fantasies of murdering my roommate and share them with the Internet.

The night I picked a fight with those three cigarette smoker girls after the buses stop running happens. (I even remembered that without reading the entry!) I recall I crawled into The Stoner’s bed and tried to hoard his body heat and radiator. The radiator always bugged him because it was right next to his mattress.

HAHA, OMG! Then the incident happened – one I was recalling recently – when The Stoner put a fake parking sticker on his car, it got towed, I didn’t have a car, so we took the bus together to pay the fine and then go get it back from the impound lot, at night, with no idea how to get there.

I don’t understand why I’m perfectly calm and cool while other people’s worlds are falling apart, and I freak out/break down when stupid little shit happens to me. Hmm…It was kind of funny, but [The Stoner] really is hurting. *sigh*

Dominic Monaghan and Orlando Bloom “quite randomly kiss.” (I suspect it was to make fun of all the RPS.)


Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers flashback – December 2002/January 2003

Let’s see what turns up…
Icon: aw man
subject: oh, I can die now
eventtime: 2002-12-21 11:01:00
itemid: 2035

By the way, (good) highlights of the week:

-I applied to college
-The Mall Show didn’t suck
-Winterfest didn’t suck
-Andrea (!!!) admitting that she too thinks Frodo and Sam are soooo doing it
-[Joel] in drag

-[Joel] in drag again??? =)
[me]: Re:
heh heh heh

You are here to risk your heart

“Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.”
― Louise Erdrich

“Just Shut Up” by Gyzym

“Just Shut Up” is one of the many great essays/blog entries I was referring to in my entry “Offending Smart People On the Web.”

The Kid said to me recently, over Facebook chat, after the new Doctor Who Christmas Special came out, that we/I shouldn’t pick apart entertainment so closely. It is not to be examined and pulled apart critically. I had been upset about Steven Moffat’s treatment of female characters in his writing.

I recently read a VERY good essay on Tumblr about racism, but this one here is about gender. The one on racism wasn’t film criticism, it was about real life situations and how white people should stop claiming we can ever understand what it is like to be black. To stop getting touchy when we are told we are being offensive. I have to work on that.

But I am a woman. It’s not the same, but it’s relevant to this essay here.

Anyway, I told him the story of my Literary Criticism professor sophomore year of undergrad. We were all very frustrated and having a lot of trouble with her version of literary criticism. I was quite familiar with reading for “fun,” and I think, by that point, had been introduced to Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series by my neighbor Sam. Those books saved my life, I still attest. Regardless of the fact Pratchett is a master of satire, I still didn’t get into any nitty gritty examinations of anything when reading him. I just flipped through and laughed and enjoyed myself. So anyway, we notice that our professor’s books – her personal books – are filled with scribbled notes. We ask her what it is, and she says it’s her notes (duh) about what she’s reading. My classmate asks her, “Don’t you ever just read for fun?” She seemed VERY confused about that. “This is my fun.”

The Kid disagrees. I asked him why on Earth he went to film school, then. He clarified it wasn’t for film criticism.

Anyway, I finally looked at my old LiveJournal entries (ya think?) and it turns out, I have matured quite a bit. Not in my personal life, but at the very least in how I consume media. Uh, mostly. Yeah, mostly. So these kind of things are not things I’m very good at writing, but I’m pretty good at going…









Though mostly my family won’t listen. They insist that racism is not their concern, and that women should get back in the kitchen. (Okay, not the latter, really. But sometimes I wonder.)

Mostly my preamble ruins this essay, so I’m just gonna shut up (ha!) and link it.

One thing that was always startling to me as a child was how fucked up many of the movies I loved turned out to be, if you examined them critically. Beauty and the Beast had always been the most problematic of the Disney canon. In all the other “princess” movies, the girl has little goal other than to “find a man,” but they go to their mates willingly. In The Little Mermaid, Ariel is so desperate, a vile sorceress is easily able to manipulate her into selling her soul, basically. This is Ariel’s choice, for the most part, although she is just a child (a teenager is still a child) and doesn’t understand that a personality clash with her father is not quite as, well, huge as forfeiting her entire identity, and leaving her species and her home, for a man who doesn’t know her and doesn’t even love her.

But it is still Ariel’s choice.

Belle has no choice, and once I was old enough to understand (very, very late, considering I’d seen the film when I was a little girl), it was clear Belle had no choice and no agency. That this blogger is right, and academics who discussed it have been right, and even anybody watching it and arching their eyebrow and going, “The fuck is this?” are right – The Beast abuses Belle and the film tells us it’s okay, because she will be able to “change” him! It paints Gaston as a rapist, but still fails to paint the Beast as an abuser. It’s obvious he’s a villain to start with, but the moral of the story is that people are “good” underneath their ugly exteriors. True, the Beast learns to let Belle go, but were it real life, Belle would thank him and get the fuck out of there and not fucking go back. Okay, okay, so she goes back to save his life from that douchenozzle Gaston, but True Love’s Kiss? Really? Really?

Much like The Kid, however, I get annoyed and defensive when people criticize the things I love, as the fem theory students learned in the classroom that day. Does that mean I can’t like it? I wonder. Or is recognizing its problems enough? 

Well, for one thing, we can’t tell people not to criticize. If people didn’t pick media apart…

We can argue for media that doesn’t push the horrible shit we need to unlearn as a society to get to a healthier place, or we can point out the flaws in our preexisting media, or we can do both. But “Just shut up,” isn’t an option. “Just shut up,” can’t be an option, because we can’t keep playing the “Nobody told me because nobody told them,” card. Nothing will ever get better that way. Nothing will ever improve if we keep not telling people this shit.

Blah blah, anyway, I was never good at this sort of thing, so I’ll just finally link this. And also, like I told The Kid, sometimes an issue needs me to see it in something like a story – a movie – first…

Just Shut Up…

I was just thinking about The Hobbit, was reading about LOTR, and then remembered to dig this up…

The night I (technically) lost my virginity was the night Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring premiered!

But the film premiered in my hometown and in wide release on Christmas Day. I didn’t write about actually seeing the film until the day after Christmas.

subject: Frodo and Samwise are doin’ it, I swear on me mother’s goat
eventtime: 2001-12-26 00:39:00
itemid: 902
Music: We Wish You A Merry Christmas……gweeeeehee…

Me and [JP] saw “Lord of the Rings” tonight and it was jeece and a half thrown into a blender with Moses, Jachariah, and Abigail Williams. I also found some slash to celebrate. Yeehaw.

Yeeeeeeea, thats exactly what Juan leaned over and said to me about 90 times during the damn movie… heh.
What, about Sam and Frodo? lol

[nathan]: Ohhhhhhhhhh Yeahhhhhhhhh.
Friend: “The movie was fast paced. They couldn’t fit Tom Bobbindale in.. If he did, it’d be.. ‘Meesa Tom Bobbindale! Meesa no like-a dat Sauron!”.. Hehehehehehhehehehhehehehe. ^^
[me]: Re: Ohhhhhhhhhh Yeahhhhhhhhh.
Sauron’s a bitch.

Jump In (“Once Upon a Time” fanfic)

Title: Jump In
Author: bostoneris aka yuffiehighwind
Rating: Mature
Fandom: Once Upon a Time
Pairings/Characters: Jefferson/Wife, Jefferson/Regina, Leopold/Regina
Wordcount: 1,723
Chapters: 4
Summary:  Jefferson wouldn’t tell anyone how the hat worked, but at least two women got to know some of its secrets.
Disclaimer: I do not own Once Upon a Time, nor the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

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