Not even sure…

…how to describe this…nervousness?

TL;DR – This is a terrible, rambly entry about fanfiction. Trigger warning for briefly talking about rape-themed fanfics.

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my seventh rewrite

“Books aren’t written, they’re rewritten. Including your own. It is one of the hardest things to accept, especially after the seventh rewrite hasn’t quite done it.”

– Michael Crichton

It’s pretty depressing…

…that I have never been in love.

Romantic love has sometimes been called “a preoccupation with another person, to the point where the beloved’s needs are placed over one’s own,” and I have never once felt that. I have never had the feeling that someone else’s needs came before my own. I have always focused solely on my needs and what I want and what will give me comfort and pleasure.

I’m a monster…

(Even my love for my family has never been that strong. Last time my family needed me in a crisis, I was scared, and my first instinct was to run away so I wouldn’t have to deal with it. That didn’t go over well.)

I’m curious how many terms our (or you) kids won’t understand

Crossposted from Tumblr

Like the term “rewind.” The reason why, of course, going backwards in a video is called a “rewind” is because you had to literally “wind” the tape back on its spool.

(Sparingly, I still used and watched VHS tapes on up through my senior year of undergrad. So I kept a VCR lying around. There was one included inside my little CRT television set, and that was 2003! Things changed so rapidly in only ten years.)

(I exclusively used a similar, larger CRT television set from 2002 until this summer! Even after my family got themselves a ginormous rear projection CRT set, and then finally switched to an HD LCD screen. The family’s desktop computer still uses a CRT monitor, but the laptops are LCD, and iPads/mobile phones in the house are, of course, touchscreens. One person still has a flip phone, which I still used until two years ago. I miss flip phones, because, as someone pointed out, you could snap them open or shut and be sassy or angry. Lightly pressing a touchscreen when you’re angry will never be as satisfying as slamming down a receiver or flipping your mobile shut.)

Although that’s not so archaic to understand as some of these symbols we have on our computers…

6 Things Our Kids Just Plain Won’t Get

The “save” symbol is a little icon of a floppy disk, which got phased out and switched to CDs when I was a freshman or sophomore in high school, after the adoption of the CD. (Yes, yes, I’m old. Okay, so 28 isn’t really that old…)

The “call” symbol is in the shape of an old, landline telephone. (Which got phased out before I was born. When I was a child, we grew up with wired landline phones, but they had buttons, not a dial. And they were rectangular, not in the shape of a classic telephone. I’m also young enough to not remember when we started using an answering machine, but it must have been when I was a child.)

“Rewinding,” of course, made you seem like less of a douche when you returned a rented VHS tape to the Video Store. This was phased out when I was, yes, a freshman or sophomore in high school, after the adoption of the DVD. Be kind. Rewind!

The symbol for “email” is still of a paper envelope.

What’s fun about this list is it also points out how many things happened in movies and TV shows that could easily be avoided today, like the classic “Restaurant” episode of “Seinfeld.” Lacking a cell phone, the gang has to depend on the payphone inside the restaurant. Another example is, a few seasons later, the gang has to search for each other in a movie theater. In fact, a couple of movie theaters, because half of them went to the wrong one. What happens could have been easily avoided with cell phones.

The article also points out that it’s more difficult now to get lost, what with GPS and mobile maps.

“Hanging up” is another expression people will have to look up the origins for later on. When you put a phone back onto its wall mount, you literally end the call by inserting the receiver back onto its base. You hang it back up. I grew up with wall mounted phones.

I never experienced dial-up Internet, however. While my, frankly, poorer friends had dial-up, even through high school and until they left home for college, my family got high speed cable Internet when I was 12.

If we wanted to use the Web, we didn’t have to yell at each other about being able to use the phone at the same time. But “tying up the line” (which I assume comes from when telephone operators used wired plugs to connect customers to the lines of the people they wanted to call, and maybe they could get tangled??) was still an issue, with only one landline in the house.

(edit: And of course “dialing!” The way to make a phone call used to be with a round dial you spun.)

Eris’ Brain is Back

Brain: Eris! What have you been doing? I hear you were trying to write some kind of analysis of Supernatural based on reading the Wiki, some essays, and like a few fanfics, or some bullshit.












Me: That’s not what I was doing at all. I said like three things on here and WordPress and most of them were merely observations…

Brain: This is not your show.







Me: Well, no, I do keep wavering on the Wincest…

Brain: Based on essays you read about it.

Me: And the Destiel…

Brain: Based on some out of context shit you read about it.








Me: I watched some of the show…

Brain: After you read some fanfics and half of Television Without Pity.

Me: Hey, I skimmed TwoP and the Wiki.

Brain: These are all spoilers. Accept the incest and enjoy the demon hunting. Don’t overthink anything. And for God’s sake, don’t write about things you don’t understand.